What Changed?
by Amourlecture
Summary: John, after six months on five, is finally home. Obviously, he has some adjusting to do. At first, everything was fine. But after only a week, he starts to notice that something's off with Gordon. His outgoing prankster brother has turned into a moody introvert. Armed with both Scott and Virgil, he's going to get to the bottom of Gordon's strange behavior.
1. Chapter 1

**AU: Hi everyone! This is my first Thunderbirds are go fanfic so please forgive me if I mess up any of the facts. I'm also fairly new to the fandom so I don't know a whole lot about the show. I've had this idea for a while but it's just took a lot of time to figure out where I was going with it. I'm going to try to update monthly, but I am a horrible procrastinator so I'm going to go ahead and apologize for that. Anyhow, hope you enjoy! Please review!**

The only reason I realized something was wrong was that the light was on in Gordon's room. Gordon was like a vampire when it came to lights and sleeping. When he and Alan used to share a room, he used to torture him by turning his nightlight off. I can't tell you the number of times I was woken up by a crying Alan telling me what Gordon had done.

I was in the kitchen getting a late night snack when I noticed it. I had just come down from five a week ago and was still trying to work out a sleeping schedule. After 6 months of being on five, it was already Alan's time to go up. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love my brothers and everything but I can only stand them for so long.

Walking from the kitchen to Gordon's door, I paused for a second, listening to see if it was just his tv playing. But what I heard confused me so much that at first, I thought I imagined it. It sounded like crying.

Frowning, I cracked open the door, not even bothering to knock. The sight that might my eyes made me even more confused. Gordon was sitting against his bed, his legs curled up against his chest. But that wasn't what confused me the most. He was actually crying. If you didn't know Gordon you probably wouldn't be surprised, but ever since the day he was born, Gordon was a ball of energy and happiness. He was always cracking a joke or pulling a prank.

"Gordon?", I called softly, walking towards him. The effect was almost immediate. Gordon's crying stopped and his shoulders tensed up. He quickly turned to face me. I was meet with a tear-stained face and puffy eyes. I couldn't remember the last time I saw Gordon cry. It had to be at least 2 years ago, right after his accident.

"John?", He said, eyes wide. He quickly rubbed at his eyes and said, "What are you doing up?"

"I was just getting a snack. I saw your light on", I said, sitting down beside him. He nodded, before looking down at the floor. He started to chew his fingernails. He only ever did that when he was nervous.

"So...", I said awkwardly. I was not the best at comforting people.

Gordon rolled his eyes, not looking at me. "I'm fine John. You don't have to say anything." He was still sniffling. I studied him for a second, taking in his messy hair and sweat covered shirt.

"Sure you are", I said sarcastically, turning my head to look at the floor. We sat there for the longest time in awkward silence, just Gordon's occasional sniffle. Finally, I couldn't stand it any longer and said, "What's wrong Gordon? You never stay this quiet."

He let out a small snort and said, "Nothing John, I told you." He still hadn't looked up at me.

Sighing, I decided I needed to bring out the big guns.

"Alright, I gave you a chance. I'm gonna get Scott", I stated. His head snapped up so quickly that I wouldn't be shocked if he had whiplash.

"You wouldn't", he said in disbelief.

Trying to get the point across, I opened my mouth and started to scream, "Scott!"

Gordon scrambled to clamp his hands over my mouth. "Shhhh! What are you doing? Are you crazy?", he hissed.

Slapping his hands away, I said, "If you don't tell me what's wrong, I'm going to get Scott."

For a second he simply sat there, weighing his options. Finally, he slumped back against his bed and glared at me, saying, "Fine, you win."

"I had a nightmare", he whispered so quietly that at first, I didn't hear him.

"Oh", I said, slightly shocked. I don't know what I was expecting him to say but it sure wasn't that.

"Well", I started. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm not three John, I'm fine. I don't need your help anyways", he spat, suddenly standing up and sitting on the edge of his bed. He sighed, rubbing his eyes. He looked exhausted and irritated.

"I'm sorry John, I'm just not in a good mood", he said burying his head in his hands.

Deciding that he needed to simmer for a little while, I stood up from the floor and said, "It's alright Gordon, I understand. I'll leave you be. Night."

He muttered softly, "Night", before turning away from me and laying down on his side. As I left his room, I turned out his light and shut the door quietly. That was just plain weird, I decided as I walked back to my room. Gordon was rarely moody or temperamental.

Once I got back into my room, I flopped on my bed, though I was too wired to sleep. I tossed and turned for the longest time. I kept thinking about Gordon. That look on his face when he saw me. What was he so scared of? It was like he was hiding something. And what was his nightmare about? These thoughts continued to run through my head until I finally blocked them out, instead thinking of what it would be like when I finally got back on five. Though, right as I started to drift off, one thought kept repeating in my head. Why was he so shaken up?


	2. Chapter 2

**Well, it's been a few months, almost a year. Whoops. I meant to update sooner but per usual, life is pretty chaotic. Sport occupies most of my time and school has been particularly rough this year. But that's no excuse. I'm incredibly sorry for the long wait. I'll try to update within the next few months. Please leave a review and tell me what you think!**

Disclaimer: I don't own Thunderbirds are Go

The next morning, I had almost completely forgotten what had happened. Until I saw Gordon's face. As soon as I stepped out of my room, I ran into him. He looked like an insomniac. His sun-kissed skin was almost as pale as mine and his eyes had a haunted look in them. He was wearing an old W.A.S.P. shirt with swim trunks. The shirt was two sizes too big so it practically swallowed his small frame.

"John", he said quietly, looking everywhere but at me.

"Gordon", I said tentatively. What was his deal? He was never this soft-spoken. Before I could say anything else, he brushed past me, heading toward the pool.

"Thanks for the talk", I muttered, turning towards the kitchen. I was expecting either Virgil or Scott to be there but was surprised when I found them both. Immediately I noticed the tension in the room. What in the world happened when I was gone?

Scott was at the fridge, gulping down a water bottle. His shirt was covered in sweat and he had on his favorite pair of tennis shoes. He must have just gotten back from his morning run. Virgil was sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee, scrolling through his phone.

I cleared my throat, trying to draw their attention. They both looked up at me, their eyebrows raised in confusion.

"What?", Virgil asked, taking a sip of his coffee. He must have just woken up. His hair was a tousled mess and he still had on his pjs.

"What's going on?", I asked, walking over to the coffee pot and pouring myself a cup. I used my NASA cup. Gordon had given it to me a few years ago as a joke.

Virgil and Scott exchanged a look before Scott said, "Nothing, what are you talking about?"

Now it was my time to quirk my eyebrows in confusion. Scott sighed before turning to Virgil and saying, "He doesn't need to know. He has enough to worry about already."

"Know what?", I asked, not giving Virgil a chance to respond.

"Well", Virgil hesitated, looking to Scott. "It's about Gordon."

"What about him?", I asked, feeling a hint of uneasiness settle in my stomach.

"He's been really..." Virgil paused, searching for the right word. "Moody lately."

"As in?", I questioned. They were acting like I couldn't be trusted.

"He's just been acting a little different, that's all", Scott said, not catching the look Virgil sent him.

I turned to Virgil, getting impatient. "What's going on?", I asked, knowing he would give me the answer.

Virgil finally broke down and blurted, "We think he's having a relapse."

"Virgil!", Scott hissed, smacking him upside the head.

"What? He has a right to know", Virgil said, swatting Scott's hand away.

"What do you mean relapse?", I said, feeling more confused than ever.

Scott sighed once again, before saying, "You remember how Gordon was after his accident, right? I mean, mentally speaking."

"Yeah", I said, not liking where this conversation was headed. When Gordon had first gotten home from the hospital after his accident, he had been a mess. He was still in a wheelchair and he had to wear a back brace all day long. He hardly ever ate and had nightmares every time he closed his eyes. It took him months to get better.

"Well, he's having a hard time right now, sort of like last time", Scott said. "As in he's not eating or sleeping?", I asked, though I already knew the answer.

"He's eating a little, though not as much as he should with all that swimming he does", Virgil said, muttering the last part disapprovingly.

"What about swimming?", said a voice from the hallway. Gordon, perfect timing.

"Gordon", I said, turning around to face him. It looked like he hadn't gone swimming after all. His bed hair was still making an appearance. "I thought you were going swimming."

"It started raining", he said, a scowl coming onto his face. As if on cue, thunder rumbled the house, booming off the walls. Looking out the window, I noticed for the first time that it was pouring.

He walked over to the fridge, grabbing a water bottle from inside. Scott, Virgil, and I exchanged a look, all thinking the same thing. After Gordon had taken a few sips of water, he glanced at us, noticing our silence.

"What?", he said pointedly, a look of irritation passing over his face.

Me and Virgil looked at each other and said at the same time, "Nothing."

He quirked his eyebrows at us before he said in an unconvinced voice, "Right, well I'm gonna go take a nap till the rain passes."

Before I could stop myself, I said, "You not get any sleep last night?"

He quickly glanced at me before saying cooly, "I slept fine", and with that, he walked to the hallway, disappearing from sight.

"What was that?", Virgil said after a while. I shrugged helplessly, while Scott said, "No clue."

I thought about telling them about what happened last night. If I told them and Gordon found out, I was a dead man. But if I didn't, Gordon would keep getting worse. Before I could decide, Scott said, "I know that look. Spill."

Realizing that I might as well tell him since he was prying, I said, "Well, last night I heard him crying in his room, so I went to make sure he was okay. When I asked him what was wrong, he said he had a nightmare."

"What? Why didn't you wake me up?", Scott said immediately.

"I wanted to but the only way I could get him to talk was if I didn't get you", I said.

"But I could have helped him. I know how to handle nightmares", Scott said. There was a little truth in that. When Scott first got back from his time in the Air Force, he himself had been a mess. For months, we walked on eggshells around him. Dad finally had had enough of it and sent him to a therapist. He was prescribed an antidepressant and it took him almost a year to get back to his old self. Even now he still had bad days.

"Scott, you know Gordon, he doesn't do feelings", Virgil said. "Besides, you tend to worry over us too much."

"I'm your big brother Virgil, I'm supposed to worry about you", Scott said interjected.

"Anyway", I said, trying to get back on the subject."As I was saying, he admitted that it was about the accident."

Virgil sighed, putting his head in his hands. "I should have known he was having nightmares. He asked me for some sleeping pills the other day.", he muttered into his hands.

"And you didn't tell me?", Scott said.

Virgil raised his head to glare at Scott."I didn't give them to him. He said they were for you", he said defensively. "I told him that if you wanted them you would come to get them yourself."

"Alright, this is getting us nowhere", I interrupted before Scott could retort. "Virgil, you're the medic. What should we do?"

"Well", Virgil started. "Normally I would say we should take him to his therapist but you know how that will go. We could just threaten him with grandma's food, that might get him to change his mind", he joked.

"We could just talk to him", I said, shocking myself by speaking up. I usually left all the talking to my brothers.

Virgil thought about it for a second, then nodded his head in approval. "It might work, so long as we can corner him."

"Corner him?", I said. "Virgil he's not a dangerous animal. We just need to sit him down and have a civilized talk."

Virgil quirked his eyebrows in amusement. "Gordon? A civilized talk? Have you forgotten who our brother is?", he said.

I was about to snap back but Scott cut me off and said, "Alright look, we're gonna do as Virgil said. Corner him and make him talk. Simple as that."

I huffed, knowing there was no way he would back out of it now.

"Well fine but if this goes south, I'm not taking any credit", I said, crossing my arms and leaning back against the counter.

Scott ignored me and said, "I say we talk to him in the morning, right when he wakes up. He's more sensible when he's half asleep."

"You gonna help us, John?", Virgil said.

"If by help you mean holding him down, no. Help as in talking to him in a civilized manner, then yes", I said.

"Don't worry, we're just gonna talk to him. Even Gordon can't turn a talk into a hostage situation", Scott said confidently.

I nodded, though, in the back of my mind, I thought, 'Oh yes he can.'


End file.
